Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished

January 31, 2007 at 11:13 pm 44 comments

Red River 

One Spring morning, my kids and I were frantically searching for Ryland’s library book.  I was already running late for work.  I remembered the night before that it was library day and had planned to put the book in his backpack before I went to bed.  But I got sidetracked on the internet and forgot about it.  It turned out that the book was not in the drawer where he usually kept it.  It has been misplaced.  I could have turned the house upside down and found it that morning but I didn’t want to miss my bus.  So I told his brothers to help him find it and if they didn’t, Ryland would just have to apologize to the librarian and he would return the book the following day when we find it. 

I felt guilty as I rode my bus that morning. As route number 11 ran along Henderson Highway, I thought to myself, this is the reason I have decided to work from home.  To avoid the morning rush, dragging the kids out of bed at 6:00, rushing them with breakfast, rushing them to get dressed.  C’mon let’s go.  I’ll miss the bus.  I’ll be late for work.

Fall 

As the bus approached Redwood Avenue, I spotted the billboard infront of the funeral home.  They always post wise quotations.  Whenever I go downtown, I always look to see what words of wisdom they have there.  I usually jot it down if they have a new one.  Then I muse, or reflect on those words.  This is what they had there on that morning. – Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.

What an irony for me that morning.  I know that we should really take things slowly, treasure every moment.  That’s why I hated that three-week period of training at the office.  That rush.  Not being able to sit down with my kids at breakfast, not being able to wave goodbye at them by the window when they go to school, cutting short our talks at night before bedtime because they had to go to bed early.  But if I didn’t hurry that morning, I would have been late.  I was only to be there at the office for three weeks and I didn’t want to display any kind of tardiness.

naked tree 

A few blocks away from the funeral home is Disraeli Bridge.  This is one of the bridges here in Winnipeg that connects the east and the west parts of the city.  You see, Winnipeg is divided by the Red River, which runs across the city.  If you’re a Winnipegger, you live either east or west of the river.  Everytime I pass by this river, I’d look from the window and look at the water and the trees that line its banks.  In the Fall, I like watching the changing colours of the leaves.  In the Winter, I like looking at the frozen water.  In the Spring, I like watching the ice melting.  And in the Summer, I just like looking at how high or how low the water is.

This is one of the reasons I enjoy living in a country with the four seasons.  Back home in the Philippines, we only have a wet and a dry season.  When I was in elementary school, we used an American textbook and we learned about the different seasons.  We learned about the changes in the environment in each season.  We even learned what sports were played in each season.  But textbook information is a lot different from actually experiencing it.  It’s so amazing to actually see the leaves turn into different colours.  And how I love that crunching sound the dried brown leaves make under my black leather shoes.  How wonderful it is to watch the first snowfall of the season; to witness the sprouting of leaves and blossoming of flowers in the spring; and to watch everything turn green in the summer.  It takes a year to go through the whole cycle.

winter 

Nature takes its course, slowly.  It does not hurry and yet everything is accomplished.  If only people could be like that.  But life nowadays is so fast-paced.  People don’t have a choice.  But don’t we really?  I remember when my middle son, Ryan, was in sixth grade and they were studying about our pioneers.  There was no electricity then.  No cars and buses.  They had to cook their food with fire and wash their clothes with their hands.  One night, Ryan asked me, Mommy, which is better, the old times or our time?  Well, it depends on how you look at it, I told him. Life then was so simple and a lot less complicated.  Now we have modern machines that help us a lot to finish our work quicker.  But then again, if technology is supposed to make our lives easier, why are we busier than ever?

spring 

I couldn’t help but ponder on this famous saying by Lao Tzu once again as I find myself busy not only with blogging but with the kids’ activities.  Last weekend, I felt Ryan’s disappointment when I told him that we had to cancel his haircut appointment because it coincided with his game and that he might have to miss two back-to-back games this week because he has rehearsal for his band concert on the same day.  I sensed my husband’s irritation at the littlest things.  I understood that he was also tired because he had been driving us the whole day of Saturday.  He had to get up earlier than usual to drive us to the game, back home to get the kids for the dentist appointment, back home again to have lunch, and back to the school for another game.  Then the passenger door of the car wouldn’t close tightly because it was frozen. The old me, err, I mean the younger me would have snapped back at his crankiness.  But I surprised myself with my calmness in all of these.

  summer 

But hold on to that applause.  Last Friday, I was out late watching Ryan’s game and I wasn’t able to tuck my youngest son, Ryland, into bed.  The next morning, he told me that he cried because he missed me. Aww, I’m sorry, baby. The other night, I was helping Ryland with his homework.  Next thing I knew, he was crying.  I dozed off on the couch!  I apologized to him and we tried to finish his homework even though it was past his bedtime.  The same way I apologized after that library book incident when I found out that I was the one who misplaced it.  I moved the book from its usual place and it got buried under a pile of paper.

One of the reasons I decided to work at home is to spend more time with my children.  In this decision, I had to forego any promotion at work and the increase in income that goes with that.  But I was alright with that decision.  Kids grow up so fast and I want to savour every minute that I get to spend with them.

sunset 

Working at home has given me spare time on my hands.  But am I using that time wisely?  I was supposed to spend more time with my children.  But as they grow older and become more independent, wanting to spend time to themselves, I got distracted by other things that kept me busy, like blogging for instance.  I have to remind myself, though, that when they do get up and get out of their respective corners after playing their Gameboy, X-Box, or Playstation that I should be there ready to listen, play or communicate with them.  And I mean not just pretending to listen while my eyes are fixed on the computer.

Author’s note:  I have shared the library book story before in my post, How I’m doing as a mother.

Another related post is The Paradox of our Time.

Entry filed under: My guilt trip, My life as a mom, Winnipeg. Tags: .

Basketball tournaments start He’s at that age

44 Comments Add your own

  • 1. Kyels  |  January 31, 2007 at 11:28 pm

    I guess sometimes we ought to stop and smell the flowers by the curb to appreciate things … And try to take things slowly. I realized that I rush a lot and ought to slow down … Hee.

    (:

    But I like the wise words. Thanks for sharing!

    Reply
  • 2. tutubi  |  February 1, 2007 at 1:06 am

    it’s more of the journey, not the destination.

    I don’t just take time to smell the flowers; I photograph and blog them hehe

    Reply
  • 3. eric  |  February 1, 2007 at 1:26 am

    Beautiful entry, Irene. You’re the one who ought to put more effort into getting published!

    Yes, that top photo reminds me of my picture; you only like mine more because it was shot here in the Philippines🙂 But I also noticed that you have been getting better with your composition, as proven by your sunset shot. You go, girl! I’ll email you some info on photography techniques that might further hone your skills and “eye.”

    I think you made the right decision with work.

    Reply
  • 4. Toe  |  February 1, 2007 at 2:51 am

    Thanks for this reminder Niceheart. Oo nga… with all the gadgets that are supposed to make our lives easier, why is life getting more difficult and stressful? Every evening, I have to remind myself to slow down and take deep breaths and relax. So many things to do and so little time to do them. But we do our best… and I really think you’re a wonderful Mom Niceheart.

    BTW, Ryland is really adorable and sweet. 🙂

    Reply
  • 5. Prab  |  February 1, 2007 at 8:32 am

    I remember someone telling me that the gadgets were invented becuase people were lazy. The remote, so people won’t have to get close to the TV to change channels. The washing machine, so people won’t have to scrub clothes anymore. Now I learn that in some way, they make our lives more complicated.

    What you wrote makes me think ahead for the time when I’ve got lots of kids of my own.😕

    Those are nice pictures, btw.

    Reply
  • 6. Belle  |  February 1, 2007 at 9:32 am

    Interesting post once again Irene. True, we are busier now that ever but it wasn’t easy of a life then either especially for a father who had to support his family singlehandedly while mother stayed home to care for the children. It can still be done though but with lots of sacrifices involved like owning one car, owning an easily maintained house, doing mostly home cooking (which is healthier), gardening, hunting, mushroom hunting, and fishing, and foraging in the forest. You be surprised there are a lot of food (greens, mostly) that grow wild that people just trampled in the dirt.

    Reply
  • 7. Leah  |  February 1, 2007 at 9:33 am

    Hi Niceheart, its true, we are always in a hurry and forget sometimes the important things in life.

    I would love to work at home to and have the opportunity to be with my child when she gets home from school. I admire your patience and you are a good mother as said by your son. I liked that homework he did. Truly, your kids are your best judge.

    http://leahmumfordlang.blogspot.com/

    Reply
  • 8. rhodora  |  February 1, 2007 at 8:22 pm

    Ang galing, Irene! I love this entry. Beautifully crafted.

    Ay, parehong pareho tayo. Me, I also resigned from my teaching job so I won’t miss the kids’ growing up. But now they are grown. Most of the time, the scenario in our home on Sundays is: me on pc, daughter on tv, son on telephone and hubby tinkering with car. And one time, I looked up and realized, “Hey, we are in the same place, but we are not really together!”

    Sigh!

    Reply
  • 9. bw  |  February 1, 2007 at 9:12 pm

    How true. The tools and amenities that we have here in North America are supposed to improve our lives but the fact of the matter is we work harder to maintain and acquire more of these tools and amenities !

    Reply
  • 10. niceheart  |  February 1, 2007 at 10:53 pm

    You’re welcome, Kyels. I guess we are all guilty of always being in a rush.

    Same here tutubi. I also take pictures and blog about them.🙂

    Thank you for the kind words, Eric. I’ve already tried to get published before but I still have a long ways to go. Besides, competition out there is tough. Anyway, I have this blog to share my thoughts and it’s very interactive pa. I have posted that sunset shot here before. I took three successive shots and this is the one I chose. Thank you for wanting to share with me your photography techniques. Please take note my email address is .ca and not .com.

    Reply
  • 11. verns  |  February 1, 2007 at 11:08 pm

    Awwww…this is really a sweet entry Niceheart.

    I think most of us have that kind of fear, the fear of being left behind or being too ahead of time. If we move at the same pace, are we guaranteed to see or enjoy everything that life has to offer?

    Anyway I know you’re a good mother and I know you can manage your time well.

    Cheers!

    Reply
  • 12. niceheart  |  February 1, 2007 at 11:09 pm

    Oh, thank you very much, Toe, for thinking that I’m wonderful. But as I’ve said before, only my children can confirm that.🙂

    I think you’re right, Prab. These gadgets have made us couch potatoes and people are getting lazy and overweight.🙂 So you want lots of kids pala ha.🙂 Thanks for the compliments about my pictures.

    Thank you, Belle. I also agree with you that life then wasn’t that easy. But life in general is not easy anyway. We just have different sacrifices to make.

    Reply
  • 13. niceheart  |  February 1, 2007 at 11:18 pm

    Leah, I really feel lucky that our company has given my the opportunity to work at home. I thought that when the children get older, I would get bored at home. But that is not the case. Actually, I also like that I am here when they get home from school. They can tell me right away if they’d have a bad day at school or if there’s anything bothering them.

    Thank you, Rhodora. I’m glad that you guys are enjoying this post. Same here. Sometimes you’ll find us in different corners of the house. We have 3 TV sets and we’d all be watching different channels. Most of the time I have to tape my shows because there’s not enough TV.🙂

    Reply
  • 14. niceheart  |  February 1, 2007 at 11:30 pm

    That’s it, BW. The more of these gadgets come out in the market, the more we want them. Hence we are working longer hours and spending lesser time with the family.

    Thanks, verns. Yeah, there are some of us who wants to keep up with the Joneses. But we don’t really have to, right?

    Reply
  • 15. sasha  |  February 2, 2007 at 12:42 am

    I am truly touched by this post, niceheart! You’re such a good mom, sacrificing your own career advancement over family. Kunsabagay, is there a conflict when choosing family over career? I don’t think so. Especially to moms like you.

    And I love the quote… “Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.”

    I’ll link you up ha, niceheart? Happy Friday!🙂

    Reply
  • 16. zeroimpact  |  February 2, 2007 at 7:05 am

    We are getting busier by the day and it’s just funny since we have so many things to help us.
    We have been chasing but we never did try to stop and rest a while
    Life is short and there are so many things that we can do when we stop and rest
    Slow and steady does a lot more and it makes life all the more better

    Reply
  • 17. Major Tom  |  February 2, 2007 at 7:41 am

    Maybe that’s one very good purpose of nature; serving as a very pleasant reminder that in this fast-paced urban world in which we live in, it of wisdom to stop once in a while and take some breather.

    Reply
  • 18. Prab  |  February 2, 2007 at 8:09 am

    Not that many. Just the typical one boy one girl kind of thing.😉

    Reply
  • 19. vic  |  February 2, 2007 at 3:29 pm

    I can not relate to your entry, other than me not being a parent, up to this day, I can only watch my own siblings children. But my baby sister could, for after 20 years of just being a housewife and looking after her children after getting married ( met her hubby during the activist year at work in manila) is now going back to work in California after graduating from her rush, rush nursing asst. training out of necessity and also boredom for the kids are all grown up now and be in post secondary pretty soon.

    And before committing to work, she is going for a tour via n.y. to her twins place and visit us here in Toronto. been in northern California and their choice of new land is fantastic.

    Reply
  • 20. Ferdz  |  February 2, 2007 at 9:24 pm

    this statement made me think

    But then again, if technology is supposed to make our lives easier, why are we busier than ever?

    Onga no? I guess people are always trying to find things to keep themselves occupied. You’re a super mom, I think you’re doing great with your kids. Every one gets side tracked once in a while we just have to adjust and adapt along the way.😀

    Reply
  • 21. ann  |  February 2, 2007 at 11:07 pm

    Sumama ako sa school last wednesday(field trip). So I have to wake up early than usual, prepare also myself. Muntik na kaming ma late. I just thought, what if I am also a working mom? di ko yata kakayanin.

    Reply
  • 22. Abaniko  |  February 2, 2007 at 11:20 pm

    Hey, Niceheart. I see a great deal of quotable quotes in this entry. You sure know your priorities. Family should come first. Don’t worry. The blogsphere is there anytime but your kids, as you mentioned, they grow fast. Later on they’d be teenagers and would start to become independent. It’s time you invest your time with them now. Build good memories for them to fondly look back to later in life.

    Reply
  • 23. KD  |  February 3, 2007 at 12:30 am

    Being a mother and working at home to spend more time with your children is I may say is very exceptional. Don’y be hard on yourself, you’re doing a great job, your kids are growing up to be smart & sweet boys.
    It’s also okay to give some time for yourself & your otherhalf.

    just wanna share this quote from ~Washington Irving

    A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.

    Reply
  • 24. kathy  |  February 3, 2007 at 12:32 am

    This is a great post, I just love it. I can relate with your experiences as a mom, although I do not work at home like you do. I used to get guilty that I have to rely on the daycare to take care of my daughter, but I realize that hey, at least she’s here with me. I was against the idea of hauling her off to the Philippines (like some do with theirs). That would certainly have made my life much easier, work-wise. But that also means that I would miss seeing her grow.

    It’s always difficult to juggle career and family, but I think the important thing is that we do not lose sight of our priorities. Our children are only children once in their lives; it would be such a huge loss if we do not enjoy them in their growing years.🙂

    Reply
  • 25. tin  |  February 3, 2007 at 7:49 am

    Wow, love your post.🙂 Different case I have, mom misses our conversation since I’ve been busy in school stuff, and blogging. Hmm…I think I should make “bawi” after our midterm. Hehe.

    Reply
  • 26. ralphT  |  February 3, 2007 at 10:16 am

    =)

    i’m back. i think…

    Reply
  • 27. pining  |  February 3, 2007 at 10:47 am

    Hi niceheart🙂 I think this is my favourite of all your posts. Beautifully written.. love it, love it!

    Reply
  • 28. niceheart  |  February 3, 2007 at 10:54 pm

    Thank you for dropping by, sasha. I think most mothers have difficulty choosing between family and career. There are those who would give up their careers just like that but there are also those who wouldn’t function if they don’t work and therefore they juggle family and career.

    True zeroimpact, we are getting busier by the day. But sometimes it’s hard to slow down when people and circumstances ask us to get things done right away.

    Reply
  • 29. iskoo  |  February 3, 2007 at 10:55 pm

    Find the sign also interesting. I have this dreams that I really eager to do now, but i know it is impossible at the moment, but in due time it will be accomplished…

    Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.

    Reply
  • 30. niceheart  |  February 3, 2007 at 11:03 pm

    You may be right, Major Tom. That’s probably why we have the term communing with nature.🙂

    Is that so, Prab? There’s also nothing wrong with having a big family. As long as you and your wife agree on it. 🙂

    Vic, there are a lot of women who choose to stay at home while raising their children. Because it can be really demanding being a mother and working at the same time. Parenting itself is a 24/7 job. Experts are now saying that just being a stay-at-home mom is like having 2 full time jobs.

    Reply
  • 31. niceheart  |  February 3, 2007 at 11:08 pm

    Thank you for the kind words, Ferdz.🙂

    Ann, it’s really not that easy to be a working mom. But sometimes you just get used to it.

    Thank you for the good advice, Abaniko. I already have a teenager that’s why I do know time flies so quickly.🙂

    KD, thank you for sharing that quote. I like it.🙂

    Reply
  • 32. niceheart  |  February 3, 2007 at 11:15 pm

    Kathy, I have a friend who brought his son to the Philippines after he was born here. She had a hard time looking for a suitable caregiver for her child and besides, her husband was also still back home then. But she was miserable. She missed her son terribly and she would always cry when we would all be talking about our kids at work. She was later on able to sponsor her husband and they were all reunited afterwards. So all’s well that ends well.🙂

    Reply
  • 33. niceheart  |  February 3, 2007 at 11:17 pm

    Yeah, tin. Bumawi ka na sa mommy. I’m sure you’ll make her happy.🙂

    Nice to see you again, ralphT. And welcome back.🙂

    Pining, thank you, thank you. I’m sure you can also relate.🙂

    Iskoo, sometimes we just have to wait to fulfill our dreams.🙂

    Reply
  • 34. ipanema  |  February 4, 2007 at 12:27 am

    I think I’m fortunate to live in a place where life is unharried. No traffic jam, no pollution [unless the haze from Indonesia drifts into our direction], among other things. It’s slow paced over here. It’s like we’re wrapped in another time zone. It has a provincial air yet modern. That’s why I’m in no hurry in uprooting myself and join the mad rush of the great US of A. I still enjoy it here.

    However, changing times is finally catching up on nature.

    Reply
  • 35. haze  |  February 4, 2007 at 4:33 am

    I have always admire working mothers because it’s not an easy task everyday. Actually it’s a triple responsibilities a wife, a mother and a career woman and as I read your story you are doing perfectly well. I hope one day I can do the same, doing 3 things at the same time wthout neglecting anything from the 3. Sooner my baby girl will be at school this September and I plan to work part time only so I will have time for them. Co’z the moment I successfully had kids, I stop working.

    Keep on posting your experience Niceheart, you are one of those who contributes a big help for me as I travel my journey to Motherhood🙂 ! As the saying goes Slowly but surely ! Keep it up Toe and goodluck to you and family !

    Reply
  • 36. Ms Fair Face  |  February 4, 2007 at 5:29 am

    oh i love those pics u posted! lovely and I wish I have the 4 seasons in my country!

    Reply
  • 37. noemi  |  February 4, 2007 at 7:03 am

    It’s one reason I also chose to work at home. I gave up a career I loved. It was really hard but looking now that the kids are in college, I must say it was worth it. I even have a career now because I have more time.

    Reply
  • 38. bingskee  |  February 4, 2007 at 11:06 am

    it’s technologizing that is the culprit. it makes people live life the wrong way.

    Reply
  • 39. haze  |  February 4, 2007 at 4:24 pm

    It’s me again Niceheart ! Sorry I meant Keep it up Niceheart and goodluck to your family🙂 ! Pareho kayo ng kulay template eh, ooopppsss !

    Reply
  • 40. niceheart  |  February 4, 2007 at 11:28 pm

    Ipanema, it must be nice to live in a place like that. I now understand why you enjoy living there.🙂

    Haze, being a mother is a feat in itself and to juggle motherhood with a career is really tough. Some mothers are lucky to be able to afford quitting their jobs but some of us are not so lucky to survive on just one income. But of course, there’s no right or wrong way. We do what we think is the best for our families.

    Reply
  • 41. niceheart  |  February 4, 2007 at 11:34 pm

    Thank you, Ms Fair Face.

    Noemi, the sacrifices we do for our kids huh? And congratulations to you for raising such wonderful kids. You’re an inspiration.🙂

    Reply
  • 42. niceheart  |  February 4, 2007 at 11:35 pm

    You may be right, Bingskee. But technology is not all bad. I guess we should just really learn how to adapt technology in our lives and keep a balance of things.

    Haze, I noticed nga that even in my comments in your blog, you sometimes refer to me as Toe. It’s okay, don’t worry about it.🙂

    Reply
  • 43. lifetyro  |  February 14, 2007 at 10:58 pm

    everything will fulfill themselves according to God’s time.

    Reply
  • 44. My very busy February « Journey to Honeyville  |  September 1, 2007 at 11:45 pm

    […] February 15th.  I attended a townhall meeting at the office where I received my fifth annual Perfect Attendance Award.  Yes, thank you very much.  I now have 4 of these glass plaques sitting on top of my desk.  The first year I received the award, I was given a $50 gift certificate instead.  I also had training at the office that day.  And what was supposed to be a half-day training was extended to five and a half days.  So I had to get up really early during those 6 days that I had to go to the office and you know how much I don’t like that. […]

    Reply

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