n i c e h e a r t

I just realized . . .

03 Jul 2011 1 Comment

by niceheart in My guilt trip, My Sweet Ryland, Raising the 3Rs, Single Mom, Working mom

“Mommy, I have a headache. Can you call the school?” That was my 13-year old son on Monday morning. “Ay naku, Ryland,” I said, “there’s only 4 days of school left. You go take a shower now and I’ll give you Tylenol.” So he went to school, without the Tylenol. He was fine. He didn’t really have a headache.

This school year, he had quite a few absences. I kinda had a feeling that sometimes he just didn’t want to go to school and he’d tell me that he wasn’t feeling well. I had been lenient with him and his brothers because I know that it has not been an easy year for them. And I also feel guilty for putting them through these hard times because of the separation with their dad. Although I know I shouldn’t feel guilty because they know the reason why I did it, and they know that it’s all for the best. One other reason I feel guilty is not being at home as much as I want to because I have these two jobs. But I try to be there as much as I can. And I know they understand that I’m doing this for them.

That night at the dinner table, I told Ryland, “You know what, I just realized that you were probably not really sick those days that you would tell me that you were.” Then my 17-year old blurted out, “I already knew that. I was laughing in my bed when I heard him this morning.” Yeah right. Because this one had quite a few absences too. Ah these boys. They got me fooled. “Oh you guys. This can’t go on. Things are gonna change next year!”